The Architect (Contemporary Clover Lake Grooms Book 1) Page 5

  Jarred straightened himself off the railing and stood tall on the porch before laying out his mat. He inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly as he stepped onto the padded surface, its chill feeling cool against his bare feet. Ms. Sullivan had introduced him to yoga as a way to incorporate physical movement into his meditation. He’d been resistant to all of it at first, but the old woman had worn him down. She was an extraordinary teacher and had him convinced faster than he’d thought possible, once she’d worn him down enough to get him to join her. He went through his usual morning routine of repeating sun salutation four times, attempting to expel all the pent-up energy not allowing himself to talk to Phoebe had built up. He inhaled deep into his belly but exhaled slowly and hard through his mouth, the back of his throat vibrating as he released the air he’d been holding. He brought his hands together in front of his chest, to heart center. He could feel how his breathing was slowing his heart rate, but he could also feel the way his body had changed. Less tense and freer, he folded himself to sitting and looked across the lake at the Sullivan house. He laughed a little to himself and then asked nothing and everything, “Is that why?” He looked around, not expecting to see or hear anyone but still needing to know what was around and asked again, “You did this on purpose, didn’t you?”

  Seven

  Jess hadn’t been long in finding her way to Phoebe’s office, where she promptly let herself deflate into the chair usually reserved for clients. Phoebe looked up from her desk, grateful for the distraction as Jess kicked the door closed with the tip of her stiletto. “Could you please tell me how I got myself into this mess?”

  Phoebe looked down at her friend and frowned. “What now? You aren’t pregnant or something are you?”

  “No. No. Nothing that tragic, but maybe…”

  Phoebe did not like the look on her friend’s face. “No. Whatever you’re thinking, just no.”

  “But you don’t even know…”

  Phoebe shook her head. “I don’t need to.” She set down the papers she’d been reading. “Why don’t you tell me what you’re talking about, and we’ll see if we can fix it some other way.”

  Phoebe was surprised to see how sullen Jess seemed. Jess was bright and lively, more happy than not. It was strange seeing her this way.

  “Well, you know Brad?” The pause, combined with her posture and the way her eyes looked, made Phoebe nervous.

  “The one that was just in your office?” She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, what about him?”

  “He’s cute, right?”

  Phoebe smiled. This was a much better train of thought for her friend. She nodded. “I mean, sure. If you like handsome men with muscles.”

  Jess laughed but briefly. She went back to frowning too quickly. “Well…”

  If Phoebe didn’t know better, she would have thought Jess was embarrassed. But that didn’t happen. Jess didn’t embarrass easily. She wasn’t sure she’d ever seen it.

  “I’ve been trying to get him to ask me out since we met, and it’s like he’s not interested.”

  Phoebe was confused. “But he was here. He has to like you to come visit at work. Melanie said the two of you have been locked in your office for days.”

  She nodded. “We have been, but mostly because I’ve been helping him try to get custody of his daughter.”

  It was Phoebe’s turn to frown. “But you’re a defense attorney. We don’t deal with custody cases. We pass them off to family court.”

  Jess stood. She looked a little upset. But mad upset, not like she had been, which was sad. “Usually, yes, but this is a special case. He asked for my help.” She walked toward the door. “I like him, Phee. I have to help him.”

  Phoebe didn’t like where their conversation had gone. Jess was the wild one. She didn’t help and take on pro-bono cases that weren’t in her field. She must have fallen pretty hard for this guy. “You really like him, don’t you?”

  Jess opened the door. “And I so badly wish I didn’t.”

  Phoebe watched her friend go. She sat staring at her open door, realizing that she knew exactly how Jess felt. She’d really liked Jarred. Granted, they were young and things were different, but that didn’t matter when the heart was involved. Teenagers were notoriously thoughtless, and they say that love makes people stupid; combining the two turned out to be potentially lethal. But Jessica wasn’t a teenager. She was a grown, independent woman that still seemed not to be thinking straight.

  No amount of meditation, yoga, or work was going to be able to keep Jarred from heading over to Phoebe’s that day. He’d tried them all. So after his shower, he grabbed a protein bar and left the house. He’d make her talk to him. She had to. They had to figure things out. He hated driving around the lake. It was so much faster to walk, but he hoped he would be there for while and maybe they’d even go into town together for dinner.

  He arrived only to find that Phoebe’s car was gone. Thinking she had run to town, he hopped in his truck and headed to Montrose. He stopped first at the diner, and when she wasn’t there or at the bookstore after that, he went to Alex’s office.

  “Sorry, J. I think she headed back to Philly. I don’t expect her to be gone long though.”

  Jarred hadn’t completely thought things through, but he found himself sitting in his truck outside of her office building anyway. As he climbed out, it struck him that he was less than three blocks from his own office. Maybe if he’d spent more time in the city, they’d have run into each other. Shaking the what ifs from his mind, he entered the building, marched up to the desk, and asked to see Phoebe. The man-child behind the desk with the headset in his ear smiled broadly at him, pointed to the elevator, and held up his fingers to show the number six, all while carrying on a conversation with whoever was talking in his ear. Jarred was mildly impressed as he pushed the button to call the elevator.

  He started to have second thoughts, or maybe first thoughts. He wasn’t sure. All of this had happened so fast. One minute he’d been in Montrose thinking about her and trying to find her and then he was on the turnpike and rolling into the city. He had no idea what he was going to say to her or if she’d even see him. The more he thought about it, the sweatier his palms got, but he decided that since he’d come this far, he would take the leap. Taking a few deep, clearing breaths, he focused on the floor buttons as each lit up in turn. When five lit up his mouth started to get dry. By the time six lit up, he was tapping his foot impatiently.

  The door opened, slowly revealing a contemporary and very busy space. There were people bustling around, but he spotted her instantly. Through the chaos, he’d felt a pull and looked up. He could see her through the glass windows in her office. He started walking in that direction the moment his foot hit the floor outside the elevator.

  “Sir. Can I help you?” A young girl jumped up from her desk and hurried toward him.

  “No, thank you.”

  “But, sir, do you have an appointment?”

  He shook his head. “No, thank you.”

  The girl stepped in his path, forcing him to either stop or run into her. His body was humming. He knew he’d be speaking to Phoebe in just a moment. His nerves were tingling. “What’s your name, sweetheart?” He plastered a smile on his face and tilted his head in that way that made most women relax their spine. It hadn’t worked on Phoebe, but maybe it would work on her gatekeeper.

  “Melanie, sir.”

  Jarred turned the full force of his eyes on her. He knew he shouldn’t have. He shouldn’t have been doing anything that could’ve been considered flirting. He felt bad doing it but knew he needed to get to Phoebe without her having the opportunity to turn him away. “Hi, Melanie. I’m Jarred. I’m just looking to speak with Ms. Sullivan.” He gave her one last look, winked, and stepped around her, moving quickly straight to Phoebe’s office.

  He knew the moment she saw him. She froze as she was getting up from behind her desk. He rushed to the door before she could straighten fully and stop him at the door. The mome
nt he stepped into her office he knew he’d made the right decision. Phoebe looked mad. Her face was red and she was gritting her teeth, but there was something about the energy of the room that made him stand taller.

  “I went to the house.” He searched for her eyes, wanting to catch them so she could see how sincere he was being. “We need to talk.”

  Phoebe shook her head and walked around to the front of her desk. “No. We don’t.” She went to the door and pulled it open. “Especially not here.” She looked from him to the door and back again.

  Phoebe couldn’t believe he’d just shown up at her office. Why would he have? She’d attempted to get to the door before he’d been able to push his way in, but she’d not made it in time. So there she was, holding the door open for him to pass through it when she caught Jessica’s eye across the office. Jess started to stalk toward them with a huge grin on her face. The gleam in her eye told Phoebe everything she needed to know. “You know what,” she shut the door, “maybe now is a good time after all.”

  Phoebe tried to be subtle when she locked the door, but the look on Jarred’s face told her she hadn’t been. “I’m just trying to keep this private.”

  He looked around the office and then tipped his head at her as if to say, “Really?”

  It was easy to see what he meant. The entire space was glass. Phoebe started to walk around closing the blinds. “Why are you here? How’d you even find me?”

  “You’re a lawyer, and though I know phone books are antiquated, Google isn’t.” He held up his phone and waved it.

  Phoebe let the string from the last set of blinds slide through her fingers. She couldn’t believe he’d shown up there. First he’d been in her space when she least wanted him there, then once she’d finally gotten her bearings and started to think that things might be okay, Alexander had given the news that Jarred had been written into the will. Then, and this was the big one, Jarred had kissed her. He’d grabbed hold of her in a moment of weakness and kissed her absolutely senseless. No matter how hard she’d tried in the last few days, she hadn’t been able to get it out of her head.

  Lying in her bed at night, his scent would swirl around her, and when she’d close her eyes, she could almost feel him there, his hand on her arm or tipping up her chin. She held her breath as she turned to face him. She could not show weakness anymore. Especially not there. “Okay. But that doesn’t explain why.” She crossed her arms over her chest.

  He stepped closer to her. She took a step back, shaking her head. “Why, Jarred?” A shiver ran down her spine. It was hard being so close to him. Until she’d seen him again, she hadn’t realized what an impact he’d really had on her, but now that they’d been together, now that they’d kissed again, she couldn’t shake it.

  He stepped toward her again, but this time she didn’t move. He took another step, and another. Until the two of them were practically nose to nose. Phoebe could feel the heat radiating off his body. She shook with the closeness of it, inhaling his scent. It made her dizzy. Her brain was fuzzy. “I just wanted to see you. Needed to see you.”

  His voice was soft, and he reached out and put his hands on her hips. She’d made herself not look at his face, but the moment he touched her, she lost that battle. “I can’t stop thinking about you.”

  Phoebe inhaled, trying to clear her head. It made it worse. She was too close. They were too close. She couldn’t think straight.

  “I’m sorry. For everything. I’m sorry I wasn’t who you needed me to be back then, behind those bleachers, and I’m even more sorry I haven’t been who you needed me to be these last few days.”

  And there it was. The apology she’d been waiting years for. That’s all she’d ever wanted. Or so she thought. She let the words sink in. Tried to get them to fill the holes that the months of torment after that night had created. It smoothed their edges but didn’t seal them shut. She shook her head. “But…”

  He leaned in and silenced her with a kiss. His lips were soft and questioning. He was asking permission this time. The thoughtfulness of it washed over her and she gave in a little more, her lips yielding and opening for his. She melted into him, but before she knew it, it was over. “Have dinner with me tonight?”

  Phoebe realized her arms were still folded tightly across her chest. She reached up and touched a finger to her heated lips and nodded. “Eight o’clock.”

  Phoebe looked into his eyes. All good plans were meant to be rearranged. She watched him leave. He turned back and winked at her as he turned the lock on the door before pulling it open. That wink made butterflies dance in her stomach. She’d been telling herself for days that she’d stay strong. She wouldn’t kiss him again. That the first time that day in the dining room had been a moment of weakness and she wouldn’t be weak again. She hadn’t known she was lying to herself until he’d walked through the door. She’d tried. She’d really tried, but Jarred was breaking down her walls and slowly repairing the holes in her heart without her permission. She wondered what would happen if she stopped fighting it. If she just gave in…

  She took a breath. “Eight o’clock,” she said to his back as he stepped out onto the main floor.

  “So you finally gave in.” Jess didn’t even wait for the door to shut behind her before she started giving Phoebe a hard time.

  Phoebe stood in front of the mirror, twisting and turning, trying to see herself from all angles. She rolled her eyes. “Shut up and get in here.”

  Jess came bouncing into the room. “It’s not a bad thing, Phee. You need this.” She scanned her friend. “And you definitely should wear that!”

  Phoebe looked away from the mirror and couldn’t help but smile at the grin on her friend’s face.

  “Smokin’.”

  Phoebe laughed and shook her head. “You’re too much.”

  “But that’s what’s so excellent about me. What you lurv about me.”

  Phoebe laughed again before turning back to the mirror. “What time is it?”

  “Time for you to appreciate your friend and tell her how much you love her.”

  Phoebe smiled to herself. She loved doing that. Jess was easy to goad. She picked up her shoes and met Jess in the doorway. “You know I do. Stop being so needy and help me finish getting ready.” She reached down for the phone that Jess held in her hand. Turning it over, she gasped. “He’ll be here in less than ten minutes!”

  She hopped into her stilettos and ran straight for the bathroom. The place was in shambles. Jess wasn’t the neatest person, and since Phoebe had been away, obviously no one had been cleaning up. She dug through the pile of clothing and products on the counter searching for her lip gloss. “What have you been doing while I’ve been gone?”

  “Well, trying to hang out with Brad mostly. Why?”

  Phoebe stuck her head out the doorway of the bathroom. “Because it looks like a microburst hit in here. I can’t find anything! I’m going to have to go with flat lips and unlined eyes!”

  Jess stepped around Phoebe and started moving things around in the small space. “I know it looks like chaos to you, but it really isn’t. Here.” She showed her a clean spot on the counter.”

  Phoebe rolled her eyes and stomped her foot, which she immediately couldn’t believe she’d done and wanted to take back. “Lovely but not helpful.” She turned and stared at Jess. “Lip gloss. I need lip gloss!” The doorbell sounded as if to emphasize her point. Her heart started hammering in her chest. “Great. Now he’s here and I don’t even have any mascara on.”

  Jess smiled hugely. It irritated Phoebe more than her lack of make-up. “Don’t look at me like that.”

  Jess laughed. “You really like him.” She shook her head. “I thought this was about showing him up. Letting him see what he missed out on. I was all for that but that isn’t it. You really like him.”

  Phoebe wasn’t sure what to say. Jess was right, on both accounts, but Phoebe wasn’t ready to verbalize it yet. “Can you get the door? Maybe buy me a few minutes?”r />
  Jess softened and smiled before she nodded and left the room.

  Phoebe searched through Jess’s piles and drawers, coming up with a pale lip gloss, a tube of mascara that still had some liquid left in it, and an eye shadow palette. She did what she could. She carefully used the darker shadow to line her eyes, and the mascara helped to make them pop. She moved silently, straining to hear what Jarred and Jess were talking about. She’d heard the initial greeting, but then Jess must have taken him into the kitchen because their voices were now muffled. Finishing her make-up with a few slight brushes of bronzer up her cheeks, she rubbed her lips together, gave herself one last glance in the mirror, smoothed her dress down her legs, and went to find her best friend.

  Her breath caught when she saw him. He was leaning against the kitchen counter with a glass in his hand. She’d never seen him in a buttoned shirt. He was always casual, t-shirts and jeans mostly. She’d seen him in a suit at the funeral, but that was different. She hadn’t been looking at him then. Not like she was at that moment anyway. The fabric was stretched across his broad chest but without straining the buttons. He had his sleeves rolled up his forearms where she could just see the tip of a tattoo peering out from under one of them.

  “She’s been through enough. I don’t…” Jess trailed off as Phoebe walked into the room.

  “Thanks, Jess.” She touched her on the shoulder, squeezing so her nails dug in just a little, even though what she wanted to do was growl at her. Why would she be saying something like that to him? She knew better. “All set?”